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Monday, October 10th, 2005
10:17 pm
late night convo with meredith wish, about my recent realizations

Smidgthemidget: i have figured out what i want in someone to date
punkfariy53: do tell
Smidgthemidget: i want someone who won't compliment me but instead will openly make fun of me
Smidgthemidget: the way that dom and quimby did
Smidgthemidget:i need to find someone so bad
punkfariy53:me 2
Smidgthemidget: yea
Smidgthemidget: i seriously need to get ben out of my vocabulary
everything reminds me of him
Smidgthemidget:i hate it
punkfariy53:i kno that feelings.....IT SUCKS
Smidgthemidget: and it isn't even like i need the fucking/sex... i juss need someone to say they want and need me
Smidgthemidget:someone who i can truly be myself with
Smidgthemidget:who will think the things i do are weird but will love thme ne way
Smidgthemidget: i feel so alone in times like these when i am not with u guys and everyone else in the house is asleep
punkfariy53:ikno how u feel

this weekend has showed me a lot about how lonely i am and how it is affecting my social life. my love right now is only for my friends who have been with me through everything. for meredith who literally got me on the floor yesterday before i knew what had happened... sara who isn't quite as strong as meredith who keeps me on my toes... and stephanie who is my super hero no matter what she does... but i need more than that... i need someone who needs and wants me, who can make me smile for no reason at all... someone who isn't afraid to openly make fun of me cause i prefer that over compliments... someone who knows that i am a complete weirdo but thinks that it is my greatest attribute.... it isn't even about the sex ne more cause g-d only knows that, that aspect of relationships gets me into trouble... gay, bi or straight i need someone who can handle me and stick with me through my tough times.... i need some for my winterball and for my junior prom (only prom i am going to)

current mood: the nights are long and lonely

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11:40 am - omg
i met a g-d this weekend and found my super hero.... my plans didn't quite go the way that i wanted them to go this weekend but they ended up being much better. Stephanie Canter is now my official superhero, she can save me any time she wants (especailly when i am about to kill one of my parents if not both of them). I went up to her house on Saturday hoping that her mom would let us go to the RHPS (which i had the cutest outfit for) but because of the rain we didn't get to go... we spent the entire day with dom and cumbi (dunno if that is how u spell either of their names), drove around, got into a minor fender bender, watched movied, talked alot... it was amazing. dom is a g-d by the way not only because he is gorgeous but because he is charming too... i let him pick my hair dye and my outfit for rhps too, he has better dress sense and style than i do and he is straight... he has 9 piercings, i thought i was going to die when he started playing with his tongue ring... i had so much fun, we stayed out till 12:30 - 1 got home, watched queer as folk. I had to tell steph that if i heard her orgasm over the show i would have to take it away, she loved it... i gotta make her, mere, sammi and myself copies before i return it to cassy 2morro... i made steph go to sleep at like 6 in the morning and then went to sleep too... sunday we went to a lounge at steph's temple, before i even got into the room sara attacked me and then as soon as she let go mere really attacked me... i feel on my ass with mere on top of me, both of us laughing beyond the point of recognition.... although the event wasn't supposed to be a lounge it was supposed to be the mega maze (a corn maze), but they are rescheduling it for the 23rd... i have to behave myself so that i can go up that weekend.... thats it for now...

ps- o yea i also found another hero who is going to make me the happiest girl in the entire world... what would make me the happiest girl in the entire world?- you ask... piercings.... i am getting them soon but i won't tell u where u'll juss have to wait to find out....

current mood: had the time of my life

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Saturday, October 8th, 2005
12:59 am - heres the real thing
ok so i said i would update at the first chance i got and here it is, the first chance i got i mean... so much has happened since my last real update... i am now single, so do you want to mingle? lol...j/p... it is a lonely life right now but i kind of like someone but am trying my hardest not to scare that person away and my friends are being absolutely amazing about trying to set me up with people... my lovely steph canter is setting me up with her friend Jessica who i have so much in common with that it is almost freakish.... she even shares my piercing fetish, i am so dying to get my tongue and nipples pierced (just waiting to turn 18)... life seems to be changing and sometimes i feel like i'll never catch up....

ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW- for those who kno me, you all kno how absolutely obsessed with the rocky horror picture show i am.... it is my favorite thing i would take going to see that show a million times over getting a million dollars... and i finally got to go to the live show... i got to loose my virginity in its entirey, and man am i glad i went... marge and i had to dance on stage and the time warp was amazing... i had an ear to ear smile on my face the entire time... sara kept giving me funny looks cause i was so happy to be there....

ENCAMPMENT- wow what a week, i got royally fucked over at that one and it seems like almost everyone knew about it before me.... i trust way too many people and i give way too much of myself... well i have now learned how to be a bitch and how to realize that some people aren't worth having in your life.... i got to know steph and got to sleep with her a couple nights, we even fell asleep in Emily's bed which wasn't even our bunk... she and i sleep together like we were meant to, like we curl up into each other and wrap around each other (ok so when i say sleeping i mean in a completely none sexual way)... i got to hang out with new interesting people and i got to be the only drama queen at usy with all of my useless crying... somethings just aren't meant to be and that should be it, wish i had seen it from the very beginning (not back in june but all the way back in the beginning, back at encampment 04)....

SCHOOL- it started and is now almost at the end of the first quarter... i am doing well, not hott but well... plenty of room for improvement especially since this is my last full year at BHS... THE THINGS I HAVE BEEN SAYING ALL SUMMER LONG ARE TRUE, I LEAVE FOR ISRAEL SOON AFTER GRADUATION IN JANUARY 07... i will miss you all but this is what is best for me, it really is.... since school is such a boring subject this is where i am going to leave it....

BOAT CRUISE- wow that was an ackward weekend... my first event as videographer and man do my tapes absolutely suck, i gotta get a sturder arm... rumors were flying about Alex Cores being in the hospital... it was juss a tough day for me... but the things that made it better were spending my time on george's island with this amazing guy and getting to be with noah and dayna (whom i love very very much)... in the end i was tired and emotionally drained....

ALEX CORES- he has been the only thing on my mind... i am trying to figure out a way to keep him involved in usy even tho he is in recovery... i came up with the idea of sending him video clips from events... i am sending my first tape to his parents this week.... my prayers are for him and a great recovery, can't wait to see him again....

ok there is alot more in my life than that but that is all i have time for right now cause i am so tired from spending my day doing nothing more than watching queer as folk... best tv sho ever... love u all and good night

current mood: so much shit

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Monday, October 3rd, 2005
3:28 pm
ok this is not a real update rather it is a forewarning that once i get the chance i will update everyone about life as i know it... a lot has changed since my last update, i have gotten a taste of some bitter reality and then again had some sweet memories to. i'll explain everything later... i love u all!

current mood: blah

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Thursday, July 21st, 2005
10:53 am - making plans
time flies when you are bored out of your mind... i mean i have trig four mornings a week and work three afternoons a week, but other than that i have done absolutely nothing interesting this summer... i have been attempting to improve the website that i built for providence usy which i hope to have up by encampment... oh yea i have hung out with dayna a couple times, i went to her 4th of july/ family birthday party and slept over a few weeks ago, and i got to hang out with stacy and jackie... i had kait and adam over yesterday to do his hair but i failed miserably because of the heat.. and i have gotten one letter from ben all summer, there was a time when we talked via texting and calling each other but he got his phone taken away or something... now all i have left to entertain me is planning my mom's 44th birthday surprise and planning away to go up to camp ramah for visiting day....

saturday is my mom's birthday and she thinks that she is going up to maine to celebrate with the family but she is so wrong... my dad and i have rented a sailboat to charter for a few hours on saturday, i am making a picnic lunch to take with us... but before that we are going to go exploring newport for the morning... and after we are blindfolding her and taking her to susan's house where susan, scott, alena, janie and michael and all of my family are going to have birthday cake... but shhhh she doesn't kno any of this....

i am hoping that this surprise for my mom will get her convince her to take me and dayna up to ramah to see the bens (whitey and ginsburg)cause i really need to see whitey... visiting day is this sunday at 2 i think, but i have no way of getting in touch with ben cause he doesn't have his phone... i need the info to settle everything and then i have to call dayna by tomorro to tell her the plan.... well i am going to go....

current mood: excited and busy

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Saturday, July 9th, 2005
1:40 pm
i welcome all of the i told u so's from all those who know what happened, and for those who don't i juss don't want to talk about it. i should have listened to the things my friends told me, cause even tho i hate when they are right they were right about this one.... altho instead of listening with my ears and my brain, i chose to listen to my heart... on the other hand i don't want ne sympathy, don't tell me that i deserve better or that i am an amazing person, because while that is tru i juss don't want to hear it right now... last night while i spent almost an hour on the beach in the rain, i realized that as much as i would like to feel hate right now all i feel is love... i am still in love, but i have no trust or anything like that left... i juss need time to figure out how to deal with things... and crying one more tear is not an option, because it isn't deserved....

don't call to comfort me cause i don't want to talk about it with ne one... i juss want to forget and move on... i want to start something new

current mood: crushed

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Friday, July 1st, 2005
12:11 pm - stole this from gabby
x. Slept in your bed: Me
x. Saw you cry: Sarah Finer
x. Made you cry: she knows... its our secret
x. You shared a drink with: dunno
x. You went to the movies with: haven't been since january so i don't remember
x. You went to the mall with: my sis and the girls
x. Yelled at you: jamie
x. Sent you an e-mail: ben to tell me he loves me

x. Said "I love you" and meant it?: Yes
x. Gotten in a fight with your pet: Yes, she won
x. Been to California: Nope
x. Been to Hawaii: Nope
x. Been to Mexico: No
x. Been to China: Nope
x. Been to Canada: Yes, in eighth grade
x. Danced naked: not recently
x. Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: kinda... but i can't explain...
x. Wish you were the opposite sex: nope
x. Had an imaginary friend: when i was three

x. Do you have a crush on someone: no i am in love with someone
x. What book are you reading now: Cry of the Beloved Country
x. Worst feeling in the world: fear and loneliness
x. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: nope i don't even keep one on my bed
x. What's under your bed: Everything... i gotta clean it out today
x. Favorite sports to watch: softball (my sister is an amazing catcher)
x. Siblings: Tal, my 13 year old pet... lol i mean sister
x. Location: my house
x. College plans: not till after i got to israel and then into the israeli army
x. Piercings/tattoos: ears and hopefully either my tongue or my nipples
x. Boyfriend/girlfriend: yes, my first boyfriend ever

x. Do you do drugs: nope
x. Do you drink: yea... water
x. Who is your best friend: i have a few, cause u are allowed to have more than one best friend
x. What are you most scared of: Sir and silence
x. What clothes do you sleep in: t-shirt and pj pants
x. Where do you want to get married: in israel, maybe in natonya (spelling is wrong, but it is a sea side city in israel)
x. Who do you really hate: no one
x. Do you drive: i got my permit on june 21st
x. Do you have a job: juss got it today, at a dry cleaner
x. Do you like being around people: of course
x. Are you for world peace: definately

x. Have you ever liked someone you had no chance of getting: definately
x. Have you ever cried over something someone of the opposite sex did: sure
x. Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: not at all, i am willing to give people a chance rather than judging them on their type
x. Want someone you don't have right now: no
x. Are you lonely right now: yea cause my boyfriend is away at camp
x. Song thats stuck in your head a lot: breathe but i don't know the singers name
x. Do you want to get married: only to a person that i love
x. Do you want kids: between 2 and 4

x. Room in house: mine
x. Type(s) of music: Wide Variety
x. Band(s): ...
x. Color: Black and red
x. Perfume or cologne: Victoria's secret love spell and bath and body's cucumber melon spray
x. Month: July
x. Stone: Emerald

x. Cried: no
x. Bought something: yea a lot
x. Gotten sick: nope
x. Sang: along with the radio
x. Wanted to tell someone you loved them: Yeah really badly, but i don't have his number
x. Met someone new: yea my new boss, he was so nice

current mood: o so bored

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11:33 am - Long Time Since my Last Update
omg i haven't updated this is so long, i've juss been so busy... things have been changing at an amazing rate around here... first thing that i gotta say is thank g-d it is summer... since my last update i finished my sophomore year of high school, yay for being a junior... then i became the communications vp of providence usy, which is the youth group i am so involved in...i met a really cute girl, who i am going to call the "new girl" in my life in a completely non- romantic way.. her name is samantha (aka sammie... not sure about the spelling, she is wicked adorable...my friend sarah finer introduced me to here at the spring fling, and then i saw her again last week... she is really sweet... in a romantic sense, i have my first boyfriend ever... i am going out with the one guy that i truly love, ben... although i miss him like crazy right now cause he is at camp, until encampment...

so within the last couple of weeks i have gone from exams at bhs to brockton for a few days... i stayed with sarah finer for a couple days, we went to see sammie and leanne and a witch... sarah got a tarot reading, next time i am going to get one...oh yea we got smudged with sage, which was strange but fun... then i stayed with meredith, we had a romantic evening out on the porch with candles and the stars, j/p, we were juss bored... then i took the train home into boston where i spent the day with ben, juss holding each other for hours... then we both went home... the next morning, tal, briana, steph, my mom, and i left for maine... we stayed there for the weekend, the girls and i went to the park a few times... i got a palm reading, which was very amazing... some surprising things were said.... then i came home... i've been home since then, and today was absolutely amazing... i got my first paying job at prestige cleaners, i start not next monday but the following monday... it is really good.... oh yea, i no longer have purple or even green hair, i got it fixed and it is now a radiant red, called ruby slippers... well i gg for now... i'll update again soon...


current mood: things are getting better

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Wednesday, May 4th, 2005
9:47 pm - bitter- sweet 16th birthday
today was a very tough day, i spent from 8:30 am to 1:45 pm at the funerals of zach and mike... and from that point on i have been trying to celebrate the joy that should be my sweet 16 although it has turned out really bitter sweet.... i miss the boys so much... today juss sucked....

current mood: how am i supposed to feel

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Monday, May 2nd, 2005
3:17 pm - 2 barrington teens die in car crash
the past two days have been the hardest days of my life. i kno that death is a part of life but i have never been affected by it the way that i was yesterday morning when i found out about the accident. yesterday two sophomore boys,Michael Neubauer and Zachary Stiness, were killed in a car accident on Nayatt rd. my heart felt like it was ripped from my chest when my mom told me about the accident, she said that two boys were dead and a third was in critical condition. the third boy was Brenden McGonagle, who is in my homeroom. the news of the accident was what i woke up to and fell asleep to yesterday, and yet it still doesn't feel real. i feel like i am going to wake up in the morning and i am going to pass zach on my way to latin and that brenden is going to be making jokes during our cpr/ health class tomorrow, and i'll pass mike in the hall at some point.. but i am not. i wish i had gotten to kno them better, i remember mike being in my 5th grade class and zach being romeo from romeo and juliet at the end of 7th grade in aqua cluster, and i am still reliving cpr/health class from last friday. school today was absolutely unbarable... first there was silence and the faces of the grieving, and then the sophomore hall way and our homerooms were filled with the sounds of sobbing people. the sobbing didn't end at all for me, i cried for a few minutes every class and cried even more when i got to my mom's work. i just can't believe that this has happened, to people i kno, people that have been in my classes since 5th grade when i moved here 6 years ago... i miss them... this is the site for today's news paper article on the accident ... http://www.projo.com/eastbay/content/projo_20050502_barrdie.228382d.html RIP Michael Neubauer and Zachary Stiness, and wishes of a speedy recovery to Brenden McGonagle

current mood: devastated

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Sunday, March 13th, 2005
7:54 pm
best weekend of my life... this weekend was the sophmore weekend at emily's house in brookline.... omg she has a wicked nice house... the people there were: me, micah, evan, sophie, emily, eve, emma, andy, noah, shane, lindsay, jody, svia, rachel, lauren, pinky, and a couple more but i can't remember who... so forgive me if u have and lj and read this if i forgot ur name... anyway we played games with good... i had to chug to bottles of coke which kept me up all nite with there sugar content... it was so much fun... the boys stayed the nite with us at emily's even tho they weren't really supposed to... it was very sexually driven and i had nothing to do with any of it... ARE U GUYS FUCKING PROUD OF ME!!!! it was an amazing weekend can't wait for eve to send me pics....

current mood: tired

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Saturday, March 12th, 2005
3:53 pm - stolen from sammi who i love
TEN random things about me:
1. I have pierced my own ear six times
2. I love Britney Spears and her music
3. I have never slept with a teddy bear or had a security blanket or anything that I took everywhere with me when I was lil
4. johnny depp is the hottest man alive along with richard gere
5. I wanna move to israel
6. needles freak me out
7. I hate people cracking parts of their body because of the popping sound
8. my favorite tv shows are nypd blue and law and order
9. I am in love with the movie rocky horror picture sho
10. i am loud and obnoxious and bossy

NINE ways to win my heart:
1. gotta be able to be urself
2. Gotta make me laugh
3. Use sarcasm, b/c I use it constantly
4. be able to look me in the eyes when u talk to me
5. gotta be able to surprise me every once in a while (not meaning scare me and not meaning buying me something expensive)
6. have to be able to have a good conversation with my dad
7. able to talk to u about anything
8. gotta have passion about something in life (something that u do for a living or hobby or something like that)
9. u’ve got to be able to smile (or at least show emotion)

EIGHT things I want to do before I die:
1. see the entire us
2. travel to every continent in the world
3. move to israel
4. have at least 3 kids with a spouse (not by myself)
5. meet someone famous
6. serve in the Israeli army
7. have my photographs put in a gallery
8. find true love

SEVEN things I wish I were:
1. less fat
2. beautiful
3. understood
4. in love with someone who loved me
5. able to go back in time
6. rich
7. funny

SIX things that get me mad:
1. people spreading rumors
2. people who are closeminded
3. hypocrits
4. that it is snowing
5. being called a whore for having a lil fun
6. not knowing whether things between u and the person u like are real or not

FIVE things I'm afraid of:
1. Being rejected
2. Being unloved
3. needs
4. not being perfect
5. heights

FOUR of my favorite items in my room:
1. my tack boards and all the pictures on them
2. my camera
3. my cd player
4. my telephones (land line and cell)

THREE things I need to do right now:
1. take a shower
2. pack for tonite
3. do my homework/make up work

TWO things I do everyday:
1. talk to coco and gorgeous
2. think about gina

ONE person I want to see right now:
1. there isn’t juss one person

current mood: bored

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2:41 pm
i kno that people have fun spreading rumors and i know that they hurt the people they are about like hell... the things that rumors are about are things that other people really don't need to kno... things that the person the rumor is about only wanted their closest friends, the ones they believed they could trust, to kno...i have already made it clear that i do not think that i am a whore for the decisions i make, because they are MY decisions... so there should be no reason for anyone to spread rumors about me, making me look bad infront of a lot more people then need to be involved is a really sleezy way of telling me u are mad at me... i'm not really sure how to feel about it tho, obviously i don't want a friend like u, but other than that i don't kno what to think... this isn't going to work... and for those who really feel i am turning into someone they don't wanna kno then juss leave my life alone and stop pretending to wanna be my friend....

current mood: quite spreading rumors

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Thursday, March 10th, 2005
6:30 pm
juss got back from the doctors cause i have been sick since i got home from israel... and i am on antibiotics... the doctor thinks that i either have broncitus or phnemonea.... yay for being sick and not being able to breath (sarcasm).... i also had to get x rays... well i have a lot of h/w to do so i'll update sometime tomorro....

current mood: i can barely breathe

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4:28 pm
i am back in the states by the way for the people who didn't kno... and it is nice to be back but at the same time i wish i was back in israel...my dad played me a song today that made me miss my country.....

current mood: i miss israel

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4:13 pm - i want to make something clear
i want to make something clear for the people who have know me since i moved to ri as well as the people who i am still just meeting... i am not a whore... and i won't have sex with just anyone... i am not promiscuous... and there is nothing wrong with having a little fun every now and again... since the beginning of this school year i have heard so many things sed about me and my sexual orientation as well as my sex life... i do what i want without hurting anyone else and with utter respect for myself... tru i don't always love the people i hook up with but i don't need to love everyone... and i juss find it very unfair that people find it so much fun to make accusations about me... and if ur accusations turn me into a "bad" person then maybe we weren't meant to be friends... if that is the case i am really sorry that u feel that way about me and about our friendship... but there is nothing i can go to change what i have done.... that is in the past and that is where it is going to stay... one thing that i am going to try to get out of my life is the happiness that comes from new experiences as well as a few duds along the way... there is a quote that most people like to recite, it goes like this... LIVE EACH NEW DAY AS IF IT WERE UR LAST!... which is what i intend to do... i want to get the most out of the time that i have.... and seriously i'm not hurting anyone, especially not myself... if anything i am making myself stronger and making myself more knowledgable... and i am really sorry to the people that read this and take offense but i don't have a problem with the person that i am... or the person that u think i have become....

current mood: stop judging me

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Wednesday, March 9th, 2005
7:53 pm
she is rite... she is always rite... i juss hate knowing that she is write... now she is mad at me, and nothing i say is doing any good... i really hate when she is mad at me... she is the only person i can't stand having mad at me, it makes me wanna curl up under a rock and die... i really wish i could make everything different juss so she wouldn't be mad at me... but i did what i did and i don't regret that.... i hate feeling like i let someone down.... especially the way she put it....and how she emphasized that i was better than that... man i need to re-evaluate the things i am doing with my life..... i hope she forgives me soon or i'll go crazy.....

current mood: disappointed with myself

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Thursday, March 3rd, 2005
12:29 pm
since i have been here i have gotten married three times... once to an israeli model, then to an israeli soldier who sed i had to move to haifa, and lastly to a bedowin from the negev... lol... it juss shows u home much fun i am having here ... i really can't bare leaving, my heart is breaking with the thought of leaving... and i can't even put my really feelings into words... i simply can't bare the thought of leaving israel again... i think this is y i didn't want to come in the first place... because i knew i would fall in love with it... my mom says that it is juss like going on vacation and loving the place u visited, but for me this is so much more... like i am meant to be here, i am meant to breath in the air and smell the diversity, i am meant to look around and see beyond the barriers of race and conflict, i am meant to hear the spoken words and to begin to contimplate there meaning, i am meant to taste the newness as well as the oldness of this country, i am meant to touch each and everything i can and in return have been touched by it... it is like a calling that i am being kept from answering....

current mood: devastated

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12:08 pm - trip in israel
2/27= went to jerusalem... went to the holocaust museum, i was really moved by the presentation of everything, and there was one quote that i read that really moved me... it was by anne frank and it sed this:

who has inflicted this upon us?
who has made us jews different
from other people?...be brave!
let us remain aware of ourtask and
not grumble, a solution will come.

from the holocaust museum we went into old jerusalem...through the arab quarter, where i broke a merchants heart by refusing to go into his shop... through the jewish quarter where everything was artsy and beautiful... to the western wall where we placed out notes to g-d... it was beautiful but i felt uncomfortable in the old city... then we went to the new city... shopped and then returned home to rosh ha'ayin....

2/28= we went to this park called mini israel, which is literally what it is... it is a park full of miniture models that are important to the country... it was so amazing cause i saw half the places in real life and then getting to see them at a smaller perspective made them really moving... from there we returned to rosh ha'ayin to pick up hadas and omer to go shopping the izrael mall in tel aviv... that was fun... i bought a couple cigars, a miniture bottle of absolut vodka, ISRAELI condoms, handcuffs, jewelry, and other cute gifts for everyone at home... most israelis have amazing english if u ask them to talk in english.... anyway i bought most of the gifts i was going to bring home... we were out until 8 and then we went home to rosh ha'ayin...

3/1= we went to mizpse ramon (sp)... a natural park... saw tons of rocks.... it was ok... then we went to a bedowin tent for lunch... that was really cool... i got married to a bedowin and my dad didn't even ask for any camels in exchange.... the bedowins gave me a bedowin name which is salwa, meaning the honey of the date... i saw how they make really coffee from roasting their own beans to grinding it and then boiling... then i had to do a belly dance, wicked embarrassing.... it was really amazing... that lasted til 6 pm...then we went and climbed a mountain at sunset, watched the sun set.... and then went home... we didn't get home until 9 last nite... omer made us an amazing dinner and i got to see itay for the first time since i've been here... o yea, when i was at the bedowin tent i had a total melt down cause i absolutely can't bare the thought of leaving here (meaning israel) on saturday... i started crying and everything... my mom promise that since i was so devastated she would allow for me to do the early graduation program and then move here... plus i hope to be back this summer...

3/2= finally a day to juss relax... tal and i didn't feel like going back to jerusalem and we juss wanted to veg out... so my parents decided to go to tel aviv for half of the day, and then they will come pic us up... so today we travel around rosh ha'ayin, went to the supermarket, bought tons of chocolate... plus i'm not feeling really good so i have kinda juss been laying around... well i'll update again soon....

current mood: overwhelmed and full w/ israel

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Monday, February 28th, 2005
7:25 am - my entire trip so far
ok i have been really bad at keeping u guys updated on my trip to israel, simply because i really haven't gotten any major alone time to type out the events of each day... so right now it is 6 am and i am going to do this while everyone else is still asleep (which they should be for about another 2 and 1/2 hours)... ok here is everything i have done since i arrived here:

2/16 & 2/17= We left the US from logan airport at 6:45 in the evening and arrived in zurich, switzerland in the late morning/early afternoon... we walked around the airport watching all the religious people daven (pray) in the waiting area... then we boarded the plane and flew to the air port in tel aviv. we arrived in israel at about 12 maybe 1ish on thursday, to be greeted by eran and ronite... we drove to rosh ha'ayin where they live got settled, toured the city and then crashed... i was so tired from the flight....

2/18= Friday was my cuzin omer's 16th birthday and she decided that she would rather go to school and celebrate with friends then tour the city with us... at about 9 am we went to a shook in rosh ha'ayin, where i got my first taste of israeli security (u have to open ur bag and get wanded by police before going into almost any building)... we walked around the shook getting a feel for israeli life.. it was fun but way to crowded for my comfort... we ate our 1st falfel of the trip, which was delicious... i bought a skirt and my lil sis tal bought 6 scarves.... then we went home and got ready to go to tel aviv with the girls, they get out of school at 11- 12ish on fridays because of shabbat... anyway ima, abba, tal, eran, hadas, ronite and i decided we wanted to go see tel aviv and jaffa... so we went to dr shakshuka's for lunch, which was a cool middle eastern restaurant... after lunch we went to another shook/flea market and i bougth a few more things cheap cause everyone was trying to close for shabbat... jaffa was beautiful, a mixture of old buildings, beautiful art, and an amazing view of the mediteranean... and we had shabbat at eran's parents house....

2/19= We went to the carmel mountains after having a breakfast picnic in scenic israel, in order to see the caves... we took a guided tour of 3 caves made by prehistoric man... it was a lil tough cause the tour was in hebrew but eran translated for me, i am beginning to get an ear for this language.... anyway i also got a shock while we were there cause for the first time i realized that eran had a pistol tucked into his belt, i was so weirded out and still am by guns...we saw all the banana fields, tal got out of the car to take a picture with her natural habitat (j/p)...then we went to the Baji Temple, omg u'll have to wait to see the pcitures cause there is nothing like this... it juss can't be describe in words... we had lunch at the bottom of the temple, which was good... then we went home and juss crashed...

2/20= We left rosh ha'ayin early to go to maytar where we have family friends from back when we lived in maryland... we got to the kornfeld's house and only eva was home... she took us on a tour of the town and then we decided that we would go to tamar's school to embarass her... we were successful, and it was fun...after doing that we went back to their house and left tamar to finish off her day at school and waited for everyone else to come home... hyam, mayier, and daphna got home around the same time, and we went to go pick up tamar... we sat around talking and then i went to my first funeral, first israeli funeral... i didn't have to go cause i definately didn't kno the woman who died but i wanted to go anyway, it was quite heart wrenching... when we got back from the funeral we set up for about 20 israeli soldiers to come over for a party.... omg that was so much fun, i made two new friends danny and niran both soldiers... danny was a laugh, niran was beautiful... i took tons of pics so as soon as they are up on the web i will tell u... they let us hold their guns (ahhh!!!! i was so scared).... it was so much fun... one soldier even gave me his baret, like the head piece for his uniform...

2/21= time to climb masada... we climbed masada in the midmorning/early afternoon... yes u heard me I CLIMBED MASADA... tal, abba, tamar, and i climbed up the snake path (torture)... i only made it to the top because abba wouldn't let me quit... i made it to the top and saw the beauty of this country... abba gave us a history lesson as we went from structure to structure, saw mountain and roman camps.... he was so amazing... although we decided to go down masada in the cable car with eva and ima... that was cool.. another thing i had never done before.... once at the bottom we saw a 5 minute video and then had a picnic... after the picnic we went into the gift shop and i finally got my OWN tallis, the one I PICKED OUT... it is a colorful mosaic of jerusalem... then we made our journey to the dead sea... we got mud, but we didn't use it cause we juss ran out of time... but tal and i went into the water... it was kinda scary getting in at first but once we were peacefully floating we were ok... the water helped take care of my scars, which made me super happy.... after that we went back to the kornfeld's, took showers and then left for home in rosh ha'ayin...

2/22= my parents used to work for a program called high school in israel, so we went to visit the school... which i hope to be attending this summer... and we got a guided tour of the changes within the school, met some people my parents knew when they were working there, and got to see my parents first house/apartment after they got married... then we went to ceasarea a roman fortress right out there on the mediteranean sea... we saw a roman amputheater and i felt like i was almost in a latin class... after that we drove to rosh ha'nikrah the border between israel and lebanon... that was really cool, we got there juss intime for sunset... then we drove to kefar vardim where w stayed the nite with the Liberskin's....

2/23 & 2/24= first thing we did when we left kefar vardim was go to Ma'alot High School... in 1974 it was held hostage by terrorists and 22 students died, so we went to the memorial... it was so sad and yet the memorial was so amazing... the guard outside even explained to us how people got out and how the israeli army came to the rescue.. on the day this happened, 50 teenagers where juss enjoying a summer program, they had nothing to do with the seizing of the 20 terrorists... after that we drove to Gani's house in Kefar Yeheskal... her dad took us on a jeep tour of the gilboa mountains.. i was terrified the whole time and yet i was in awww... when we got back to the mushav we saw the b&b we were going to be staying at... then we got to see the livestock, tal and i played with the calves for a while.. then we went out to this neat little restaurant where they served only fish, well i had pasta but there was no meat in there... it is was kinda gross and kinda cool... the next morning we woke up at 7:45 am to feed the calves... had a nice breakfast in our lil home, and me the neighborhood pets (mainly mek a huge great dane)... then we went shopping in afula with gani and elyran and went to a shook... the rest of the day was spent preparing for tal's bat mitzvah.. which was the most amazing thing i have ever seen.. it was at bet alpha an ancient temple and omg was it nice... i am so proud of her... she did an amazing job... after that we had a party at gani's....

2/25- 2/26= we left Gani's house for kefar hittim, where i met lior and we had an instant connections... as soon as i walked in the door lior told me we were going out to a pub later on that nite... then she took me driving around... i met sivan and omer, sivan is the sweetest person i have ever met and omer was adorable... he had the most beautiful blue eyes, almost as beautiful as mel gibson's.... anyway we spent the day hanging out we went to a cliff and looked at the view.. then lior and i got ready at her house... sivan picked us up and then went to pick up gal and naor (i have no idea whether i am spelling these names right)... so the 6 of us went to the pub, they ordered me a sex machine.. whcih was osm... then after that we went to the beach at naor's kibbutz, where we made a fire and started smoking a nargila... that was fun.... we played never have i ever with 5 fingers, i lost almost instantly... we talked and sang.... we played games with the nargila, and but the end of the nite i got to kiss all 3 israeli boys, but i got to make out with naor after i refused to pee in the woods, and he had to take me up to a bathroom... it was so much fun, we didn't get home until 5:20 in the morning and didn't get to sleep until 6... then my parents tried to wake me up to the golan heigts, but lior and i convinced them to let me spend the rest of tyhe day with her, sivan, and omer... we went driving, and then to mcdonalds (for the firs time in years), and we went to the beach... we got home at 7 pm and left for rosh ha'ayin at8:15 ish.. got home at 9:30- 10ished... and i passed out..

2/27= went to the high school in israel for a tiul with the american teens...we went to the caves from the abr cochas revolt (not sure about spelling)... we went into the caves and crawled throught the tiny little tunnels, i loved it, tal was a lil nervous... we we crawling on our hands and knees as well as our bellies, thorugh small holes, in complete drakness... then we went to a roman fortress where i told my mom alan was wrong because he was calling where we were an amputheater but it was a circus maximus... we went through another cave and had to find the way out on our own... then we got back from the tiul and drove an hour to jerusalem where we were spending the nite with leah and jeremy and their 6 kids..

2/28= today!!! we are leaving to explore jerusalem in a few minutes...

current mood: in love with israel

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